by adam mathes
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Field Trip

I should really start formulating my thoughts into more coherent structures.

Or, at least, calling them texty texts.


So I went on a field trip Sunday.

Seriously, this isn’t like something I’m just making up because it sounds completely ridiculous.

I went on a field trip.

It was for my geology class. Yes, geology, but that’s a whole other story. I know, I never even wrote the Quarter in Review for last quarter, and I haven’t said much about classes this quarter. There’s just not much to say. Again, that’s another story.

Sunday afternoon, as I was walking toward the meeting place for my field trip, I kept running the through whole thing in my head, since it made no sense.

I am walking to the geo corner parking lot. Ok. Check. Everything a-ok.

To go on a field trip.


It doesn’t make any sense! I’m 21! I’m in college! I’m not going on a field trip! Something is wrong somewhere.

I calmed myself and started again.


How old am I?

  1. Check.

Where am I?

I Look around. I’m at Stanford, I’m a student here. Check. Everything is still making sense.

What am I doing?

I’m going on a field trip.

No! No! No! It doesn’t make any sense! What planet is this? Where am I? What the fuck is going on here?

I took a deep breath.

I decided to try again.

I took out my wallet.

I examined my license. Birth date: 4-14-80. I was born in 1980. Today is January 18, 2002. That makes me 21. I took out my poor, abandoned by SNK NeoGeo Pocket Color, and turned it on to double check the calendar.

It tells me that it is March 20, 1999.

Technology fails me again.

I take out my student ID. “Issued 09/18/1998.”

See! Proof! I am a college student!

A college student about to go on a field trip to look at rocks.

At this point, I was nearing the rendezvous point.

I was greeted with a, “Hi, are you here for the field trip?” further evidence that I was not simply making the whole crazy thing up.

As always, I dealt with the folly of my existence in a mature way. I ignored it and spent most of the trip thinking dirty thoughts about Hello Kitty.

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