by adam mathes
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I received one of those “somebody has a crush on you” emails.

Although I’m sure everyone else is more popular than me and has already gotten dozens of them and knows what that means, this was of course new to me, so I’ll provide an explanation so that in ten years when I read this I have some context.

So you get this email telling you that somebody has a crush on you, with directions to go to a site. There, you register and enter the email addresses of your crushes, and then if there is a match, they notify you.

It just seems so junior high to me.

Have I mentioned that I hated junior high?

Fuck. As I was writing this Yuping owned up to doing it as a joke.

Proving once again that communists do not know how to follow through with a joke.

All he had to do was wait a few days and I would probably have entered the email address of every woman I’ve ever known. Then, in classic Charlie Brown style, none of them would have turned out.

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